For Mark and Georgie

Today was a good day
a filled with warmth day,
a tripping over smiles day,
a sparkly diamond ring day.

A day for sharing food,
stories, laughter.

Today was a commitment day;
a day for I love you’s
spoken over and over.

Susan Jane Sims,
January 3rd, 2015

For Georgie, I want this to be my best blog and most self-indulgent blog. Here goes.

Firstly I love her unbelievable amounts and she’s made me happy, despite the cancer, everyday I feel it’s great to be alive just because I know she’s alive too, let alone now my fiancée.

Back in February when all this began, I did not think I would survive until now. I’ve surprised myself in many ways. I’ve always had belief in myself and that’s important, and this is the story how I surprised myself most of all, by finding the love of my life, the best person in my life and now my fiancée.

As I went on the train of fundraising, spreading awareness, and well inspiring. What’s always surprised me mostly about the blog is actually how some of my closest friends didn’t read it, but through word of mouth and looking at the handy wordpress stats, a lot of people do. In time they now all read it. Without me even knowing it a girl very similar in age to me had read it. She was drawn to it and understood what makes me tick like no one else has. She came to my lecture, dragging one of her friends along, but she would have gone on her own. I’m sure she would have, she’s like that, Georgie’s like that. She knows her own mind, doesn’t always communicate it but she knows it. She wanted to see the man who was defying the odds and trying to do his little bit for Cancer Research UK, before he died.

I guess it’s weird how life turns out. People say “it’ll happen when you least expect it” this was about as unexpected as possible. I remember thinking before my talk, Leicester has been good to me “will I meet someone tonight?” I actually shook my head at myself, I didn’t have much hope, I have cancer. The day started badly too, I was waiting for a lift up to Leicester from Matt. I guess it was optimistic to think he would wake up on time after a night shift, but he had reassured me. Instead he woke up to a very angry me, who he mistook as a delivery driver because of me in my scooter helmet angrily ringing the intercom of his flat. I was livid, there was a chance I would be late now. I was fuming most of the way up. It was embarrassing to turn up late to your own talk. I arrived twenty minutes late or so and started in a rush. After a couple of slides I started to slow down and get into rhythm. There was a deathly silence on the slide where I highlighted that I had, what I feel is, “The Worst Cancer”, in metastatic malignant melanoma, due to it’s aggressive nature and up until recently no treatments.

After my talk in Leicester, I went to the Lansdowne bar to meet up with old rugby lads and a few attendees of the talk. I was drinking americanos to keep focussed. We then decided to gatecrash the Medical Finals after party before the finalists went off for their electives. Quite a lot of people came up to me that night as I was expecting. Some who recognised me and some whom I’d forgotten in the bar crawl haze when I’d probably met them before. Actually one of the first girls I spoke to, all bit walked over the last bit of my confidence, basically being overly sympathetic and telling me how one of her patients in her OSCE (objective structured clinical examination) had cancer and it was all very weird that I had it too. I felt more like a patient than a person. I spent the next thirty minutes or so catching up with others, politely declining many drink requests. In the middle of the room, two women came up to me. One I recognised, yes she’s the one who took the photos at the infamous freshers’ week fancy dress bar crawl, the fancy dress seemed like a good idea at the time. However after endless “detagging” on facebook after one of my consultants added me on Facebook, because I felt the humour may be lost on them, meant it wasn’t such a good idea. The ex media secretary started chatting to me. Her friend however caught my eye immediately. She was naturally beautiful, a tightish blue dress (still my favourite), radiant blue eyes and sleek dark brown hair. A dash of makeup and a cheeky large smile. Great. We chatted for about 15 minutes or so, spreading the conversation between the two of us. She went off I was concerned perhaps I was being too hopeful, but I felt a spark. So I soon moved over to her on the dance floor of Vodka Revolutions. I started speaking to her again. She had lived in South London like me, hmm, age. She said second year. Bit young, I do have the cancer. So “how old are you?” “oh 26”. Great, a graduate medical student.

Just a couple of months younger than me actually. There it was a similar laugh to mine, a hyperventilation laugh. I really felt that I was in, but was I? Apparently her friend had spotted us from a distance and thought something was going to happen. I wish she had told me, my heart fluttered. I didn’t want Georgie to get away. I found out she was going to the union too. My friends, being male, were better organised at getting out of the door of the bar and we convened outside. Hmm, she’s stalling waiting for her friends I thought. I was wary of shafting the guys if I didn’t spend time with them, but I knew they’d be supportive. They waited for a bit but quickly headed off when she finally came out. Pretty much on her own. She seemed to know, at least by face, most of the other people walking up to the union. We walked up on New Walk, Leicester’s pretty pedestrianised walkway that runs from the centre to Victoria park. We strode off, Georgie basically ignoring everyone else but me. Conversation was effortless. I remember, we talked about the fundraising and the blog. She’d read both and donated, furthermore she’d cried at the talk hidden at the back right. She was funny. We started talking about relationships, I needed to know she was single. It was not coming out. She told me she wasn’t looking for a boyfriend, at least that’s how I remember it, I remember feeling slightly wounded. Was I wasting my time, did I really have a chance anyway? Eventually just as we were turning onto the campus I said “Are you single?” “yes” although it may have seemed obvious by then. At the union were separated quickly she went to the toilet and caught up with her friend. I grabbed my friend Kiran as soon as I saw her at the bar. Kiran started talking to her. Oops, talk to the other one mate, I thought. The group moved slightly and I weeded in. We got drinks and then headed to the dance floor. Despite not being drunk, one thing I’ve never been self conscious about is dancing, and I’m pretty woeful. Stop thinking about it and just have a good time. We danced and eventually we kissed. It was soft sensual and lovely. Around me the lads were all high fiving. Soon after Matt whispered in my ear “so I’m forgiven then” I replied with something like “yes but you’re still a twat”. We danced, then Georgie brilliantly suggested our own version of tequila slammers, so we asked for small lemonade’s but instead they gave us big cups of lemonade with ice so we downed them anyway. We danced for ages messing around and laughing until four in the morning.

This is how we met. It was as close to love at first sight as you’re going to get, but as Georgie likes to point out, she loved me before she met me, plus she said it first. But I love her the most so that makes up for that. From there on our overarching desire for each other has pulled us through. We met up again for a coffee and organised a date the following weekend. The coffee was in fingerprints, Georgie remembers her cheeks hurting afterwards because she was smiling all the way through. We were there for so long when we left Georgie text me to go back, because she’d remembered that we’d forgot to pay. The following weekend we got a boat from Waterloo to Greenwich, to go to the planetarium. It’s been a fairytale.

Georgie has been more than just a fantastic girlfriend, she’s had to give up something so vital, so inane to be with me. A normal life. I’ve told her to leave me, because I’ve felt at times she’d be better off without me, she could find anyone, as she’s very beautiful, fortunately for me she finds me too adorable. She gave up a lot to go to The University of Leicester to do medicine and by dating me has risked it all, I’m understandably emotionally time consuming. It took me a long time to get over the self conscious feeling of being ill, for Georgie it just was never an issue, she feels life can end any point and we should just live it and not ignore our feelings. She loves me and that’s it. She’s also given me loads of happy memories, my favourite photo of us is one of us wet and cold climbing up Goat Fell, on the Isle of Arran in unsuitable waterproofs both getting rather cold. We’re both smiling, no matter what we can always make each other smile and laugh.

But I’ll never truly understand what I’ve given her, in my times of insecurity she’s told me that she wishes I could see me through her eyes. Then I would understand. I think that’s probably true. We’ve shown each other what love is. It’s rawness, it’s beauty and it’s fantastic. By going through more as a couple in eight months than many do in a lifetime that initial flourish of love has gently simmered and I love her even more for it, if that’s possible. She also gives me the unseen things, a sense of purpose, a reason for living. In some ways this has been difficult for friends and family to see, there will be times when I’m quite introverted (I’ve got a lot to think about) but then be much more animated on the phone to Georgie. This is in part as she brings out the best in me, but for her I want to be the best. I’ve wanted to be that bear who inspired her to go to the talk in the first place.

It is of great regret, that I did not meet Georgie sooner, we’ve actually thought of times where we were pretty close in proximity over the years. Budapest (that great city once again) and a University of Leicester open day, I was a tour guide. If you ever fall in love, embrace it, it’s amazing. People who are married, say that when you know you know and I knew. I’d been planning this engagement for a number of months, I had hoped to ask Georgie after her exams, but the Dabrafamiracle didn’t see us through. A diamond ring, diamonds fit for a princess, with their inner radiance and beauty to core, I couldn’t think of something more fitting for Georgie. She told me all she wanted for Christmas was me, so that’s what she was going to get, (plus some other things too).

I’d gone to Kent after hurrying down to the Marsden, after my talk at a nursing conference in Birmingham, it had actually seemed like ages since I saw Georgie. My life is so incredibly varied and random with routine being stripped away like a drop of the hat. As every day is that bit different life seems to thankfully to take that bit longer. I’d stopped over at Dave’s on the Friday night to see my brother Matt for a nice curry. Georgie had the car in Birmingham and so drove to Kent, I needed to get the train to be seen urgently at the Marsden. As I’d been told the tumours were growing and Dabrafenib had stopped working.

She picked me up at Tunbridge Wells station and we parked and headed straight to Holland and Barrett for some probiotic tablets. A specific bacteria Bifobacterium was associated in mice to improve the efficacy of immunotherapy and I was desperate to get some. I was being a bit more conservative with a lady in the shop who came over to help us find said bacterium about reasons for wanting it. Georgie just came straight out with the cancer, her reasoning is they may know a bit more, they didn’t but the women was lovely and she went to the toilet to cry. We then went for Georgie’s favourite dish Pad Thai and went for a walk around the park. I’ve already elluded to this by now, but what with the diagnosis was putting pressure on the situation, I was now in the unknown regarding treatment. It would be more romantic to say it didn’t pressurise me, but I was so desperate to do it. It was such a lovely day, the park was hazy in the dimming light but we were virtually the only ones there. I kept thinking why don’t I have a ring in my pocket to give her. We arrived back at Georgie’s, I kept having moments where I didn’t say much although I think it went unnoticed or passed off as me being thoughtful about the cancer. I wanted a second alone with her Dad which came naturally to quickly ask him if we could get engaged. Georgie wanted this tradition and I did not want to let her down. It didn’t come, there was a time I could have gone into the lounge with him alone but I felt Georgie would be wondering what I was up to. I find it hard lying to her, so it’s best not to give her any reason to ask questions. But that moment didn’t happen. In the park I had also tried with limited success to gather what her ring size was. I bought rolo’s and playing with the foil I made myself a ring, emphasising I was just pretending to feel what Dave feels now, as he had just got married and really wasn’t used to wearing bling. I then made one for Georgie and asked her what her ring size was, only with a “I don’t know”. I was quite disappointed it would have made things a bit easier. The rolo foil on her finger wasn’t a particularly good measure so I gave up. With her Dad I was hoping for a moment similar to my friend Matt had, he was out with his future in laws and Rachel’s (his finance) father went to get a round in Matt went up and said just to help him carry the drinks and popped the question then. The problem I had and it sounds like I’m being lame is I was very concerned that that he would talk me out of it, I’m pretty sure Georgie would say yes. After all lets be frank we both have much more pressing things to do, with her exams and me staying well. Worst of all I did not want to leave Georgie a widow but I wanted that change, albeit quite soon in our relationship, of showing her just how much she meant to me, because she means everything to me. I was frantically trying to think of the words for her Dad, saying something like “I really want to marry Georgie and I want to get engaged with your blessing, however I’d be inclined to wait until the disease was more stable as I don’t want to leave your daughter a widow”. It’s thoughts like that which show just how mad my life is. I knew one thing I am totally and utterly in love with her and if that’s not a good enough reason to get engaged I don’t know what is. I didn’t want to hold back so two days later I forced my own hand. I bought a ring. Although not from where you would expect. I had been up to Kingswood high street near my parents for a flu jab and to collect contact lenses and thought I’d go into a Jewellery shop there. The high street has gone into some kind of terminal decline and there wasn’t one to be found, at least not one upmarket enough. So I started looking online and the first place was Amazon, the ring size well I guessed M as it was the average woman’s size and well it’s the first letter of my name, so must be. I won’t divulge the price but it was the most expensive item I have ever bought, more than my TV and my scooter. I was torn between two styles I knew Georgie wanted a princess cut and previously had said she would like diamonds along the rim. Personally I liked the princess cut without diamonds down the side. After a very long time indeed of looking at both these styles and all about the 4C’s of diamonds, carat, clarity, colour and cut. I eventually went for the one with diamonds on the rim, the perfect choice. Time was now ticking.

A few hours after purchasing it I had a call from Amazon, a call centre in Bangladesh it was slightly random and only after he told me other things I purchased did I let on. He was just confirming that I had actually made such an expensive purchase. I didn’t know whether to be offended, but I guess it was the largest purchase of my life.

I went for a walk with my Dad in the hills between Bristol and Bath some of it I had walked before. Being involved in scouting from a young age and more specifically joining a group which trained for the “Ten Tors Challenge” a grueling plight across Dartmoor. So I’d been on lots of the part of the walk before and it’s a great area. We may as well make use of being suburban, the countyside is very close. At the peak of the hill we could see across most of Bristol in front of us and most of bath behind us. On a clear day you could probably see all the way to Clifton Suspension Bridge. This walk was firmly added to the mental list of “things to do with Georgie”. Throughout these couple of days at home I even downloaded the Amazon App just to keep track of the ring. Always saying awaiting dispatch. The more I looked it at the happier I was with the purchase. I liked diamonds in a geeky way, they were beautiful to look at but beautiful scientifically too. Diamonds achieve their brilliance due to their high index of refraction, which means the critical angle is only about 25 degrees which means a lot of the light which goes into the diamond is reflected back out. It’s what creates the rainbows and the shine from them. Also their ability to survive almost anything, their eternity was something I wanted to symbolise the relationship. I wasn’t the only resilient one in this relationship. Georgie was much stronger than she thought she was, she’s a tough cookie, I’m proud of her for completing the half marathon that day and pulling Matt and I around at her steady pace.

I went about crudely planning the engagement, obviously it massively required her to say “yes”.  Importantly if we did live together, like many people who get engaged, it would be great, that was something we’d both agreed. But was entirely impractical at the moment, I’m a nomad flitting between my brother’s flat, seeing Georgie (in Leicester, Northampton, London and Kent) and being at my family home in Bristol. But nonetheless I had the ring, and luck favours the brave. All I know is I knew I am totally in love with her, and want to spend the rest of my life with her. She was a seriously great girl with a golden heart and a loads of love to give me. I guess you can see I was having a couple of doubts, as it did risk rocking the boat. However I had shown her my mock wedding plans (to make it clear there are no plans nor are we planning, this was just a sentiment) a couple of months ago, she was surprised the fact I’d done it,  so was I, but she loved it. From the start of our relationship I’ve been writing all the great things we’ve done together, I find it therapeutic and takes my mind off of things and of course Georgie really enjoys reading It. The wedding plans I showed her were Normanton Church which we’d cycled past on Rutland water on what has been many of our perfect bike rides. Be this tandeming around Brixworth County park lake, her mum was seemingly impressed how I dealt with her bemoaning how I wasn’t helping, obviously I was, or the countless Boris Bike rides, the last time around Battersea Park at night. Normanton Church is just on the shore of Rutland Water, as the church had just survived the man made flood as they closed the reservoir in the 1970’s. It is small and personal, and it helped that there was a wedding going on that day, which we sat watching and commenting on most of the guests. Perfect location. So, I digress as always, the plan was to ask her just before Christmas, having got the blessing of her Dad first, was to hand her my phone at some pretty location sat on a bench, and just say I forgot to show this video I made. The video I’ve made is a collection of pictures of us, interspersed with clips from a video Georgie filmed of me talking. She asked me questions like “what would you tell yourself ten years ago” I said I’d reassure my geeky self to say that I’d meet this amazing girl Georgie Latcham. The video ends with me answering the question “what would you ask me?” I reply “I think I know what I want to ask?”, that point I was to get on one knee, pop the question, get a yes. Simple. By going through the photos I was reminded by the fact that I only bought new clothes after we started dating, I’d given up beforehand and thought well if I’m going to die what was the point, she inspired me to get out and live again.

I kept checking the Amazon app. I didn’t know what was taking so long really, but it was due to arrive in plenty of time before Christmas. The more I flicked onto the photos of it the more I was happy with the choice, like I’ve said I was fairly certain it was close to Georgie’s description of her perfect ring. The more I looked at it the more I realised why it was better with diamonds on the edge.

The first weekend of December, was the first weekend actually I’d spent with Georgie, where I didn’t have any treatment of any kind in my system. The weekend was very relaxed and we had a great time, on Saturday evening I said as much, Georgie then reminding me that we hadn’t really done anything! I guess that’s the point we didn’t have to. We discussed Christmas presents and I said she’ll leap on me when she finally finds out what her main present is, I probed a little at a bit to check that she still saw a future with me. I really didn’t want to get a no, and she said she did. All systems go. Even a subtle time to ask her Dad was formulating.

There it was on my Amazon, “out for delivery”, no turning back! The ring had symbolically taken quite a journey to get to this point, from Israel no less, I guess like our relationship had, well actually it had been quite easy we were mad for each other at the start, but obviously it was fraught with cancer related difficulties. Like going to appointments, fear that I would die quite often, combined with cheering when things were going well. We had a perfect moment in clinic when I was told actually the pain I was getting in the liver was nothing and I’d in fact had more shrinkage. Georgie started playing “Three Little Birds” by Bob Marley, right then after the staff left, and we did the Wolf Of Wall Street Chest bump. We felt invincible that day.

Things didn’t work out quite how they intended to. Instead they worked better. The weekend before Christmas, Georgie and I went to her parents for our Christmas Day, along with her brother and her sister in law. In the evening whilst the rest of the family were busying themselves with a puzzle I went to get a drink knowing her Dad was in the kitchen. I stuttered a bit but eventually it came out “I’d like to get engaged to your daughter” then we had a long chat, about life, my reasons for wanting to do it, and how much they like me and read the blog. How I made her happier than he has ever seen her with anyone else. He was very positive and delighted how happy I’ve made his daughter. But  quite rightly he needed to speak to his Georgie’s mum first. They were thrilled by the news, and said yes, we very much had their blessing.

The day after I had my first dose of radiotherapy, and somehow became very feverish afterwards and that was when I was admitted to UCLH. I was just on the bed in resus thinking I really wish I’d done it.

As I was calling Georgie I was being whisked back from chest X-Ray, giving my Dad the phone to finish the call. All I managed to say was “tachy, temperature 40”

Diagnosis until found not otherwise, neutropenic sepsis, please see other blog about this.

I was then due to be going to the Marsden for more Pembrolizumab. This obviously turned into the episode of the previously blog. Need we reminding.

But somehow by the evening of Saturday the 2nd Georgie and I were watching TV in bed together, feeling mostly like a normal couple, as could be. Georgie was still upset about what had happened (two days before – when I lost the ability to talk), we all were. Georgie and I went off on a walk. Ring planted in my pocket. Right there on the steps of the Royal Marsden Fulham I asked her to marry me, after telling her how special she was to me how we adore each other and most of all just how much we love each other. She said “Yes” but was crying too much and it felt very overwhelming for me to be out of the hospital for just  a short time, so we went for a  walk and calmed down. We discussed tons of our relationship on the way around. Feeling buoyed she was ready, the photo one, and the one we’re calling the actual engagement. However on our walk back to the main steps of the Marsden there was a hitch, someone was smoking outside. So we walked around the block again only to find an uber waiting then I got my chance, repeating mostly what said last time, at last she took the ring.

My Facebook status

‘So well! Georgie and I got engaged this evening. After a nice short walk around Chelsea where we reminisced about how we’d done so many great things together, I proposed on the steps of the Royal Marsden. This was my first wander out of the hospital since admission.

I told her how much she means to me, I told her I needed her, I told her how much I love her, I told her how much she makes me happy. She’s quite simply amazing, she didn’t need to get involved in my crazy life but she did. For her it was always simple she fell in love with me from the second we met and I fell in love with her at the same time.

Obviously we have significant other priorities so there is no talk of a wedding. This is to show my love for her and to hoping that I can repeat my miracle of meeting Georgie by beating this awful cancer.’

Mum and Dad were surprisingly up by my bed when we got back, so we had a cheers in the day room, water of course. They were both beaming and very pleased. They weren’t surprised as I’d shown Mum the ring before Christmas.

After my parents left Georgie and I led on bed together, which is obviously an infection control “no-no” but a just engaged couple “yes-yes”. But was kind of politely and slightly sternly asked to leave at 10.30, which meant we had to continue complimenting each other over What’s App, and announcing the news on Facebook. It was quite a bizarre way to spend your first evening engaged.

The next day Georgie had a couple of friends coming to see us already (now obviously friends with me too!) plus my friend Nick was coming too. We asked our parents and I asked Dave, Paul and Alice too. For an impromptu celebration in the Burdett Coutts Day room. We asked for Schloer more than anything else, but alcohol came along too. A good mixture of savoury food from Georgie’s Mum, sweet things from everyone else, and a very nice Hummingbird Bakery cake with congratulations from my Mum. I even said I didn’t know if an engagement cake was a thing, but then again nothing about this engagement was normal or turned out to plan.

We had a few choice words at the end starting with me… Plus my Dad, her Dad and Georgie herself. My Dad actually summarised what I said in one beautifully honest sentence “you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him”.

Georgie had to get back to uni that day, and the whole thing finished about 4pm, in some ways I really don’t think the day could’ve been better and the engagement couldn’t have been more perfect, and that’s encapsulated by my Mum’s poem. We all left smiling.

The poem at the top is written by my Mum who’s a keen poet who writes, publishes books and wins prizes. http://www.poetryspace.co.uk

#TopDoc2015

Thanks to my old GP supervisor who used to take me out for a lot of Nando’s as the practice was just above. He the keenest Twitterer I know and saw that the prize was going ahead. Personally I only use it when I publish a new blog. I took to Facebook, and spread the word. It was amazing how many people, said they either had to sign up or have an account and never use it, because they don’t understand it. But they got past those barriers and I won with 120 votes. The two other commendations went to @Liz_Riordan, @docjohnhinds “@johannmalawana. In order, a fellow blogger check out her blog A Breast Surgeon with Breast Cancer (http://www.Liz.oriordan.co.uk). John Hinds, a 35 year old Anaesthetist and popular lecturer in trauma science, was sadly killed in an accident whilst providing medical cover during a motorcycle meet. He wasn’t driving he was on the side of the road. Johann is the BMA’s Junior Doctor representative and has been heavily involved in the negotiations and the industrial action. Thanks everyone for voting for me, it’s such brilliant recognition, I’m getting my picture published in the 16th Jan issue of BMA news. Plus it got a few more donations and we’re over the all important £55000.

Hairless

I was feeling very lucky to have avoided hair loss from the radiotherapy and most importantly managed the engagement with my hair still intact . It was almost like it was waiting. However two days later it was very easily coming out. As I was being discharged that day, I went straight to a barber, for a trim, well a continued annihilation of my hair and to smarten up the beard. Dave told me afterwards he was thinking about taking a photo but saw my face and thought better of it. He was right. Having written a whole blog about curly hair it’s clear that I like mine a lot. For one it covered the scar, and two I’ve got good hair.

So I sat there glum thinking through all the unfairness of it all. I’ve got used to it since with glasses and a beard it’s not too bad.

K+

I was actually back at the Marsden the day after discharge, but this time the Sutton one, my potassium had come back at 2.9 (low) and I needed to get it checked again. On arrival got some SandoK (horrific potassium replacement – tastes like seawater) and had my bloods taken and left. Only for my brother Matt’s car not to start. After some guys helped us jump start it, it stuttered and stalled. Fortunately the second time around with me pushing, it leased to life without me pushing albeit stuttering a lot so Matt drove off to run the engine. I ran up the hill after him, it was a big mistake, I got about ten metres before I was completely shattered. I breathlessly walked up the hill until he came back. The steroids have already made my leg muscles weak. The potassium came back at 3.9mmol so I didn’t take any more SandoK.

On Friday 8th

I was back in for them to see my progress, outside the waiting room after getting chatting about the apparent recent loss of hair. Another patient asked me what stage of treatment I was at. I explained that I had almost died last week, which put a dampener on the conversation, but then I went on to explain my story to her and about raising the cash. I then asked her about her cancer, she said that she’d had advanced melanoma I pressed her for a stage just in case she didn’t mean stage four. She said that “she’d never been told” I didn’t press her for all her tumour sites but I got the impression she was riddled below the neck. This is because she nonchalantly explained twoyears pretty much to the day, that she’d was given a choice between a new therapy Pembrolizumab or to try the chemotherapy. She didn’t know what to chose but went for the Pembro, I got the impression or her memories are waned, but this wasn’t an easy choice as she had the impression the chemo worked, in melanoma it doesn’t do anything and is now off the guidelines. She was coming to clinic today to consider stopping the Pembro, as she’s had complete regression of all her tumours with no side effects. Wow. She didn’t seem to realise how lucky she was. She was a lovely lady, although her husband didn’t say much, and they have an autistic son at home, and because of Pembro, she can stay looking after her son. I just really truly wish this was not in my head.

This is a remarkable story and she doesn’t know why. It was great for me to see and hear her story and her ignorance, as it was charming in a way, because that’s the way it should be, that’s the oncologist’s dream.